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"I have an investment opportunity for you. Profits are almost certain. The risk is definitely minimal." | Once I get your check, my profits are certain. There's no risk for me. |
"It would be illegal for me to guarantee profit. But our customers are making thousands of dollars a month on our investments." | Not a single one of our customers has ever made a dime on our investments and none of them ever will, but if I don't say the words "guaranteed profits" I may be able to stay out of jail. |
"Once you see how well you do with me, you'll be my client for life." | Once you invest with me, I'll keep calling to get more money from you until you absolutely refuse to invest one dollar more and tell me that at least three times. |
"If you don't take some risk, you'll never make a profit....The opportunity is going fast. You better act now." | The biggest risk you could ever take is listening to me, and I know if I don't get your money now, you'll find someone who will talk you out of this crazy thing you're about to do. |
"I know you've been burned before on investments over the telephone, but trust me that this opportunity is different." | I know you've been burned before because I bought the mailing list from those guys after government regulators put them out of business. And trust me, my investment opportunity will be just as sure a loser as those others. |
"We've been in business for over 20 years." | We close down and change our names every two years or so to try to keep one step ahead of law enforcement. |
"Are any of your investments currently showing you a 40 to 50 percent return with low risk?" | I know there's no such thing as an investment that makes that kind of return with low risk, but if you don't hang up the telephone when I say that, I just may be able to get you to buy the junk I'm selling. |
"This is the next great business you've been reading about in the papers. It's going to make fortunes for people, and you can get in on the ground floor." | Fortunes can always be made by people who devote great time and energy to develop businesses from the ground floor, but not by people who just send checks to someone who calls them on the phone. |
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